as most of you guys know, our journey to get baby sims #2 was not a short or an easy one. we started trying for baby #2 in jan 2020…and we will be welcoming this little girl into our family over 3 1/2 years later. after several rounds of IUI, IVF, and loss…we could not be more ready or thankful to meet this little miracle here in just a few short days!
if you know me at all…you might know that i am, in fact, the least patient human on planet earth. i’m not good at waiting. i also like to be in control of when things happen and i don’t like to be surprised. let me tell ya…our fertility journey has thrown all of that out the window! over these last 3 1/2 years i’ve had to learn that i’m not the one in control, as much as i would like to be. i might have a plan in mind of how i want things to go…but i don’t have the final say. and thank THE LORD for that! one of my favorite psalms over these past few years has been…
psalm 31:14 – But I am trusting you, O LORD, saying, “You are my God!” My future is in your hands.
our fertility journey / growing our family definitely did not go according to my plan. but as i look back on these last 3 1/2 years i’m able to so clearly see God’s hand at work. he was working in my own heart, in michael’s, in our marriage…in my own healing journey. really pressing on our hearts and asking us “do you trust me? do you trust my timing?”
believe me when i say…i know how brutal the wait can be. even now while we are in a joyful season of waiting to meet this little girl any day now…i am reminding myself of that verse above…
my future, this baby girl’s future, is in God’s hands. and i can trust that. i can trust that he has me continuing to wait right now for a reason.
so instead of wishing this waiting away…i am asking the lord to help me find purpose in this wait. to enjoy every second i get with 1:1 shiloh time. my morning walks or meditation time (bc i know that’s about to change)…and so many other things in our world that i know will never be the same once baby #2 is here. the wait is hard (for both physical and emotional reasons) but instead of wishing your season of waiting away…pause. take a deep breath. ask the Lord what his purpose and plan is for this specific season of waiting. there is so much growth and life that can happen even here, even now.